This would be the last post for the year 2005...
It would also be my last night shift for the year 2005, but I would be spending the countdown in my ward with my colleagues and patients.
So, let's face it, it is a brand new year, I am going to be one year older. Hopefully, I would also be able to change my marital status too by the end of May.
So in the 2006, I pray for happiness in whatever I do and may my relationship with Baku grow stronger. I also pray for those who is reading this post of mine to be contented and happy in their lives. As for Geraldine, I wish for God to bless her health so that she would be able to return back to school to do what she enjoys most. Amen.
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Thursday, December 29, 2005
ND Tonight
Hi blog,
I just woke up. Feel like a pig already. Even Wombat thinks I am a pig princess sleeping more than 12 hours for the past two days.
Anyway, I am going on night shift tonight so I won't be enjoying normal sleep for the next few days until 2 January 2005. I would be sleeping in the mornings until late afternoon and must be fully awake from 8pm-8am. Haha... like a noturnal creature.
So... let me wish everyone who reads and is reading my blog...
HAPPY 2006 & May All Good Things Come in 2006...
(I also truly hope that 2006 would be a better year for me since I have so many stuff to look forward to in 2006)
I just woke up. Feel like a pig already. Even Wombat thinks I am a pig princess sleeping more than 12 hours for the past two days.
Anyway, I am going on night shift tonight so I won't be enjoying normal sleep for the next few days until 2 January 2005. I would be sleeping in the mornings until late afternoon and must be fully awake from 8pm-8am. Haha... like a noturnal creature.
So... let me wish everyone who reads and is reading my blog...
HAPPY 2006 & May All Good Things Come in 2006...
(I also truly hope that 2006 would be a better year for me since I have so many stuff to look forward to in 2006)
Friday, December 23, 2005
Thots...
I was on the bus this evening, on the way to meet Baku for dinner. I was thinking about some stuff and suddenly this train of thoughts struck me.
Life = A Book
The start of life is like starting an empty book. As life past, you would begin to write down the details of memories in the book, page by page. For beautiful memories that you wish to remember, you would use a pen and highlighter to note the details. For not so beautiful memories but worth rememebering you would just use a pen to write it down. As for those memories that you don't wish to remember, you would write it in pencil and then erase it whenever you wish to replace it.
Thus, as life progresses day by day, year by year, you realized that the beautiful memories that you have jotted down with pen and highlighter were not worth remembering and you desperately wish to erase it so as to move on in life, you would flip back to the wanted page, where you jotted down that beautiful memory, which by now hurts you deep inside, use a correction tape or liquid paper to blank out that part of the page. However, after the liquid paper or correcton tape dries out, the page becomes permernantly damaged by that blot of white 'mess'.
Few months or years down the road, as you accidentally open up to the page where you have created the 'mess', you began to still recall what was the detail that you had intended to forget or intended to erase.
Why? This is because, the mess you create had reminded you of the painful part which you had intended to erase off... So no matter how hard you try to forget a memories that was 'imprinted' in your brain, you will NEVER be able to do so.
Hence, moving on in life is not about forgetting the painful memories but more of closing one eye to that memory and telling yourself, life is not just about that particular upsetting memory. It is about leaving that memory still engraved in you mind but constantly reminding yourself to ignore it.
Walking away or avoiding the memory is also impossible... As wounds would always heal with a scar or a keloid... Looking at the scar or keloid is just a way of knowing that you have been hurt before. The pain doesn't hurt now but you can still remember the pain when you have been hurt even if it is 100 or even 1000 years later... (That is if we do live that long.)
Life = A Book
The start of life is like starting an empty book. As life past, you would begin to write down the details of memories in the book, page by page. For beautiful memories that you wish to remember, you would use a pen and highlighter to note the details. For not so beautiful memories but worth rememebering you would just use a pen to write it down. As for those memories that you don't wish to remember, you would write it in pencil and then erase it whenever you wish to replace it.
Thus, as life progresses day by day, year by year, you realized that the beautiful memories that you have jotted down with pen and highlighter were not worth remembering and you desperately wish to erase it so as to move on in life, you would flip back to the wanted page, where you jotted down that beautiful memory, which by now hurts you deep inside, use a correction tape or liquid paper to blank out that part of the page. However, after the liquid paper or correcton tape dries out, the page becomes permernantly damaged by that blot of white 'mess'.
Few months or years down the road, as you accidentally open up to the page where you have created the 'mess', you began to still recall what was the detail that you had intended to forget or intended to erase.
Why? This is because, the mess you create had reminded you of the painful part which you had intended to erase off... So no matter how hard you try to forget a memories that was 'imprinted' in your brain, you will NEVER be able to do so.
Hence, moving on in life is not about forgetting the painful memories but more of closing one eye to that memory and telling yourself, life is not just about that particular upsetting memory. It is about leaving that memory still engraved in you mind but constantly reminding yourself to ignore it.
Walking away or avoiding the memory is also impossible... As wounds would always heal with a scar or a keloid... Looking at the scar or keloid is just a way of knowing that you have been hurt before. The pain doesn't hurt now but you can still remember the pain when you have been hurt even if it is 100 or even 1000 years later... (That is if we do live that long.)
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Sianz To The Max
Dear blog,
I am sorry that I didn't blog for so long, leaving you out in the cold, suffering from spiders crawling and cobwebs all over you. Just can't find any topic and time to type an entry. I know you will forgive me for leaving you bored.
I think I am getting psychotic. Keke... Muah hahahaha....
My NM is getting on my nerve...
1) No Xmas celebration for me. She gave me evening shift on the 24th and morning shift on Christmas day itself. So that means I can't enjoy myself fully on Christmas as I have to wake up early.
2) She gave me 5 days of AM duty from 18 Dec 2005 to 22 Dec 2005! I totally wake morning shift and yet she can give me that. I have never got 5 days straight evening shift before so no reason why she gives me 5 days straight AM duty!
3) She keeps nagging at us for small, simple, trivia matters... (No wonder she ain't married, 'coz no guy of the right mind would be able to stand her.)
4) She owes me a total of 1 day off and my xmas + new year 2006 PH days. That is 3 days in total.
5) Oh yeah, I am working night duty on 31 Dec 2005, so no countdown for me...
On the bright note:
1) I have already booked my furnitures package for our future house. ( Maybe next year or maybe in 2010) Haha!
2) Baku and I are certified 'clean' and free from HIV. (Can R.O.M safely already.)
3) 2005 is ending soon. Which I hope life would begin to get better in 2006! (Hopefully...)
I am sorry that I didn't blog for so long, leaving you out in the cold, suffering from spiders crawling and cobwebs all over you. Just can't find any topic and time to type an entry. I know you will forgive me for leaving you bored.
I think I am getting psychotic. Keke... Muah hahahaha....
My NM is getting on my nerve...
1) No Xmas celebration for me. She gave me evening shift on the 24th and morning shift on Christmas day itself. So that means I can't enjoy myself fully on Christmas as I have to wake up early.
2) She gave me 5 days of AM duty from 18 Dec 2005 to 22 Dec 2005! I totally wake morning shift and yet she can give me that. I have never got 5 days straight evening shift before so no reason why she gives me 5 days straight AM duty!
3) She keeps nagging at us for small, simple, trivia matters... (No wonder she ain't married, 'coz no guy of the right mind would be able to stand her.)
4) She owes me a total of 1 day off and my xmas + new year 2006 PH days. That is 3 days in total.
5) Oh yeah, I am working night duty on 31 Dec 2005, so no countdown for me...
On the bright note:
1) I have already booked my furnitures package for our future house. ( Maybe next year or maybe in 2010) Haha!
2) Baku and I are certified 'clean' and free from HIV. (Can R.O.M safely already.)
3) 2005 is ending soon. Which I hope life would begin to get better in 2006! (Hopefully...)
Saturday, December 10, 2005
Counting down...
Today is 5 months before ROM and our 5 years 7mths anniversary... Celebrated it by:
1) Eating at Coffee Club (Raffles' Place) and having MUDDY MUD PIE.
2) Bought another SK ring for myself
3) Bought Blackcurrant tea to share
4) Watched Chicken Little at Century Square
Now, gonna juz sit back, relax, enjoy our Blackcurrant Tea and spend some quality couplehood time together.
1) Eating at Coffee Club (Raffles' Place) and having MUDDY MUD PIE.
2) Bought another SK ring for myself
3) Bought Blackcurrant tea to share
4) Watched Chicken Little at Century Square
Now, gonna juz sit back, relax, enjoy our Blackcurrant Tea and spend some quality couplehood time together.
Friday, December 09, 2005
5 Months Countdown
Yesterday was my friend's ROM and yeah, I was not invited... Tried calling her but she didn't pick up the call. Wanted to congratulate her and asked her how things were but didn't get the chance to. So sad...
Anyway, tomorrow would mark the countdown to 5 more months before it is my turn to ROM. Baku and me has came out with many ideas on how to celebrate that day. I have thought of either a quiet, hush hush family dinner or probably buffet. As the both of us are kind of introvent and don't really like much crowd, the family dinner sounds more feasible.
Our wedding bands are still stuck in Belgium and would be back in mid January 2006 as informed by Max, our SK salesman. *sigh* It better be good and perfect this time, otherwise I still won't hesitate to send it back for furthur amendments.
Side track a bit:
Oh yeah, I argued with this H.O called Benedict Yan 2 days ago and trust me, from this incident I realized how petty some man can be. Lol, I think he should have wore a skirt instead of a pants. He called me hostile for some stupid reason which I doubt it was even called hostile to began with. Somehow, everyone in my ward thinks he is really a sissy. Still pissed off with him. Best of all, my NM still sides him. (As usual...) My NM still can tell me that I am one who is childish, revengeful, making matters big out of a molehill and asked me not to have a cold war with him... *sigh*
Anyway, tomorrow would mark the countdown to 5 more months before it is my turn to ROM. Baku and me has came out with many ideas on how to celebrate that day. I have thought of either a quiet, hush hush family dinner or probably buffet. As the both of us are kind of introvent and don't really like much crowd, the family dinner sounds more feasible.
Our wedding bands are still stuck in Belgium and would be back in mid January 2006 as informed by Max, our SK salesman. *sigh* It better be good and perfect this time, otherwise I still won't hesitate to send it back for furthur amendments.
Side track a bit:
Oh yeah, I argued with this H.O called Benedict Yan 2 days ago and trust me, from this incident I realized how petty some man can be. Lol, I think he should have wore a skirt instead of a pants. He called me hostile for some stupid reason which I doubt it was even called hostile to began with. Somehow, everyone in my ward thinks he is really a sissy. Still pissed off with him. Best of all, my NM still sides him. (As usual...) My NM still can tell me that I am one who is childish, revengeful, making matters big out of a molehill and asked me not to have a cold war with him... *sigh*
Monday, December 05, 2005
Misses At The Moment
Listening to some Christian worship songs while typing this entry.
Feelings: Neutral
Mood: Missing someone (don't want to say who so as to prevent any furthur misunderstandings)
Stuff I miss lots at this moment...
1) Peppermint ice cream (with chocolate chips)
2) Making pewter bowl at Royal Selangor
3) Sipping 'Heavenly Senses' (with lots of menthol syrup)
4) Wombat being online (she went out)
5) His voice
6) Muddy Mud Pie (yummy)
Stuff I hate this moment...
1) Got to work AM tomorrow (damn't! gotta wake up early)
2) Portrait Of A Home 2 ended with a no proper ending (what happened to Daqiu and Baozhu in the end)
3) It is still 2005 and still 26days before 2005 ends
4) The ribena is too sour (put too much syrup already)
5) Myself for not understanding myself well enough
Hope tomorrow would be a better day and that I am not the overall I/C for the 20 patients... I would just die flat...
Feelings: Neutral
Mood: Missing someone (don't want to say who so as to prevent any furthur misunderstandings)
Stuff I miss lots at this moment...
1) Peppermint ice cream (with chocolate chips)
2) Making pewter bowl at Royal Selangor
3) Sipping 'Heavenly Senses' (with lots of menthol syrup)
4) Wombat being online (she went out)
5) His voice
6) Muddy Mud Pie (yummy)
Stuff I hate this moment...
1) Got to work AM tomorrow (damn't! gotta wake up early)
2) Portrait Of A Home 2 ended with a no proper ending (what happened to Daqiu and Baozhu in the end)
3) It is still 2005 and still 26days before 2005 ends
4) The ribena is too sour (put too much syrup already)
5) Myself for not understanding myself well enough
Hope tomorrow would be a better day and that I am not the overall I/C for the 20 patients... I would just die flat...
Friday, December 02, 2005
Story Of Candy Cane
Has anyone ever wonder why and how the candy cane came about? I did! So I went to search the net and found this simplified article on it...
The Candy Cane Story
A candymaker in Indiana wanted to make a candy that would remind people of the true meaning of Christmas; so he made the candy cane to incorporate several symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus Christ. He began with a stick of pure white, hard candy. White to symbolize the Virgin Birth and the sinless nature of Jesus, and hard to symbolize the Solid Rock, the foundation of the Church, and the firmness of the promises of God.
The candymaker then shaped his cane into the form of a "J" to represent the precious name of Jesus, who came to the earth as Savior. It could also represent the staff of the "Good Shepherd" with which He reaches down to to reclaim the fallen lambs who, like sheep, have gone astray.
Thinking that the candy was somewhat plain, the candymaker stained it with red stripes. He used three small stripes to show the stripes of the scourging Jesus received. The large red stripe was for the blood shed by Christ on the cross so that we could have the promise of eternal life.
The Candy Cane Story
A candymaker in Indiana wanted to make a candy that would remind people of the true meaning of Christmas; so he made the candy cane to incorporate several symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus Christ. He began with a stick of pure white, hard candy. White to symbolize the Virgin Birth and the sinless nature of Jesus, and hard to symbolize the Solid Rock, the foundation of the Church, and the firmness of the promises of God.
The candymaker then shaped his cane into the form of a "J" to represent the precious name of Jesus, who came to the earth as Savior. It could also represent the staff of the "Good Shepherd" with which He reaches down to to reclaim the fallen lambs who, like sheep, have gone astray.
Thinking that the candy was somewhat plain, the candymaker stained it with red stripes. He used three small stripes to show the stripes of the scourging Jesus received. The large red stripe was for the blood shed by Christ on the cross so that we could have the promise of eternal life.
Thursday, December 01, 2005
1 Dec 2005
You know when you give your love away
It opens your heart, everything is new
And you know time will always find a way
To let your heart believe it's true
You know love is everything you say
A whisper, a word, promises you give
You feel it in the heartbeat of the day
You know this is the way love is
Chorus
Amarantine Amarantine Amarantine
Love is always love
You know love may sometimes make you cry
So let the tears go, they will flow away
For you know love will always let you fly
How far a heart can fly away
Chorus
You know when love's shining in your eyes
It may be the stars fallen from above
And you know love is with you when you rise
For night and day belong to love
---------------------------------------------------
Somehow, listening to songs by Enya makes my mood more calm and less stressed up. The lyrics to her songs are also meaningful.
Tomorrow, I would be going back home, which means less time to blog and to be online as my parents would be 'snatching' the computer from me. Another thing about going home is that I have to face someone I never love and never could bring myself to respect and love her anymore. Sad case right? But life is has to go on with her 'cause she would always be present unless she dies an early death. (Cruel of me to be cursing her but oh well, that is how I really feel.)
Today, is Baku's first day at work. Wonder how he is doing? Hope that he does enjoy his current job 'cause the past jobs weren't up to his liking.
Next week, my dear friend would be entering a new phrase in her life with the guy she loves. She would signing the 'contract' of a lifetime. Wish her a blissful married life with Simon. *envious* Mine would be so many weeks and days later... *sigh*
It opens your heart, everything is new
And you know time will always find a way
To let your heart believe it's true
You know love is everything you say
A whisper, a word, promises you give
You feel it in the heartbeat of the day
You know this is the way love is
Chorus
Amarantine Amarantine Amarantine
Love is always love
You know love may sometimes make you cry
So let the tears go, they will flow away
For you know love will always let you fly
How far a heart can fly away
Chorus
You know when love's shining in your eyes
It may be the stars fallen from above
And you know love is with you when you rise
For night and day belong to love
---------------------------------------------------
Somehow, listening to songs by Enya makes my mood more calm and less stressed up. The lyrics to her songs are also meaningful.
Tomorrow, I would be going back home, which means less time to blog and to be online as my parents would be 'snatching' the computer from me. Another thing about going home is that I have to face someone I never love and never could bring myself to respect and love her anymore. Sad case right? But life is has to go on with her 'cause she would always be present unless she dies an early death. (Cruel of me to be cursing her but oh well, that is how I really feel.)
Today, is Baku's first day at work. Wonder how he is doing? Hope that he does enjoy his current job 'cause the past jobs weren't up to his liking.
Next week, my dear friend would be entering a new phrase in her life with the guy she loves. She would signing the 'contract' of a lifetime. Wish her a blissful married life with Simon. *envious* Mine would be so many weeks and days later... *sigh*
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